Tag Archives: review

Up My Ass With A Purple Rod. A Sex Toy Review

Once upon a time, there was a 20-something year old black girl with a big butt, and a penchant for exploration. She sat on the internet all the time roaming for anything sexual to make her tingle. One day while surfing, a purple stick of vibrating beads nearly bumped her on the nose from the other side of her computer screen. She clicked “buy now”, and the rest was history.

This is the story of me, my webcam, my man, and the Waterproof Flexible Vibrating Beads.

SAM_3142

 

The year I first bought this toy was 2006. I’ll start with the positives with this thing.

Pluses

  1. The beads are smooth all around so no rough seams that could tear you inside.  *Upon checking Amazon, a 2012 review stated their toy’s beads were not smooth. Mine were and each was made of two pieces of acrylic as stated in the review. I guess mine were buffed or Pipedream has changed the quality of it since I last bought it.
  2. The beads are graduated nicely. The first one isn’t too big which can be a big fear for a first timer with beads. Of course, I’d decided I would try beads based on porn views and knew what to look for, but I’m so easily influenced.  pathetic
  3. I love purple. I think it also comes in a nice, bright pink. The purple one looks more jeweled so this thing is easy to look at.  Again, it doesn’t look intimidating.
  4. It has about 4 speeds, I think. I don’t quickly recall because it’s been a while since I’ve used it. More on that in the “minuses” section.
  5. The vibrations are intense but not too strong to cause numbness if you leave it on or in you awhile. Low speed is even good with this thing, that’s if you usually you have to have your vibrators on high like I do.
  6. This thing is great for clitoral stimulation and vaginal penetration for the g-spot.
  7. It’s flexible so you can bend it in positions while you do other things with your other hand with other toys if you need.
  8. It is not loud. It vibrates to produce a nice murmur.
  9. It’s relatively cheap. You can get one less than $20 excluding shipping.
  10. It is actually waterproof.
  11. It’s easy to clean.
  12. It’s durable.

Okay, I think that’s all the gushing I can do about these flexible beads. Let’s get to the bad part!

Minuses

  1. Is it my pussy and ass, or is it really so easy to burn this vibrator’s motor out? It worked fine for several uses. I’ll say after about 10, the thing starts to blink out.
  2. I bought this toy 3x before I gave up.

I just don’t know what is with this thing, but it was disappointing to say the least. There are flexible beads that don’t vibrate I could buy. Ehh.

What we’ve done with these beads. 

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Together:

Missionary style-him rubbing it on my clit while he plows me.

rollclit

Foreplay-vaginal penetration with lots of in and out. The largest bead seems to rub my g-spot very well without trying much.

Me solo:

Anal-on cam on the bed. It’s easy to reach over my huge ass to push this inside of me back there. I’ve made a video using this toy in that position. Yea, don’t ask as I’m not passing the clip around.

Masturbation-on the side of a garden tub filled with a bubble bath. I also did myself on the tub in a video for him. The flexible vibrating beads were easy to reach over my front for rubbing the top of my clit, again because of the stick they are on and because they flex. I was fat at the time, so this was major. It seemed like a short extension of my arm, but enough.

sluttub

 

As I’ve said, I haven’t bought this toy again. I liked the idea. I don’t think it was my brand of batteries (it takes AAA I think). I use Duracell batteries. I don’t think I put too much stress on it.

Still, I love Pipedream toys. I’m an actual fan, but this was a failure nonetheless. Maybe one day I will give in to those regular, manual flexible beads. Who am I kidding?

nah

Lick My Clit and Have Me For Life: A Sex Toy Review (NSFW)

It’s a well-known fact. Well, it isn’t and you likely won’t have me for the rest of the hour, forget about the rest of the week, forget having me at all. I’ll have you know I’m committed to the best pussy licker in the world. My baby licks it good. That’s right, he licks it like no one else can. And before you ask, no, you can’t challenge him to a lick off.

But as I was saying, I love oral sex. I love having my clit licked and sucked, and from time to time I like penetration with my licking. So imagine my delight upon learning that I could have both at the same time, and I could have him do it to me hands free.

By California Exotic
By California Exotic

The first time I saw this dildo was in a porno, of course. I watch porn all the time, much more often than he does. I don’t remember much about the clip, except that the girl was having the time of her life having her clit swabbed down with a fat tongue and her pussy stroked with a pretty decent sized, fake dick. That was years ago, and I only recently got around to ordering one for us. Over the years, we’ve used several types of sex toys and all of them, save for a few, were great, but they ended up dying or some shit. I usually only go for the battery operated toys, the manual joints do little for me, even if I’m not using them on myself, so I fully expected this one to be another fail. I was wrong though, pleasantly surprised and undeniably wrong!

Everything about The Accommodator is perfect. The shape of it, the texture, the pliability, the length, and the straps even fit. When “A” (that’s what we’ll call the mister from now on) initially took it out of the packaging I prepared my anxious, little heart for a sure let down. “His head won’t ever fit it those straps.” I thought. Again, I was all wrong about this toy. The straps did fit his big ass head, and it didn’t cut off circulation to his brain. As I looked on from my spot on the bed, I said to myself, “It just might work, my baby won’t have to spend his last moments sucking my pussy until I had at least 10 orgasms.” Yea, I’m a multi-orgasmic woman. I can cum during a session, by only thinking about the dick. But I digress.

So, he slides it on, right. I’m all lying there waiting, geeked and shit. He gets on his knees and works his magic, sucking and licking the clit, then he pushes the dildo in. Omg! Did I say that this thing was the best dildo I’ve ever had? I did? Well I‘m going to say it again. This is the most comfortable, non-irritating (I tend to be very sensitive to foreign objects in the snatch), flawlessly curved fake dick I’ve ever rode.

By the time he was ready to fuck me with his real thang, I was shaking in exquisite agony, my knees curled up to my chest, cream streaming from my twat.

Get one, for your woman, or for your man (shove it up the ass after you throw the dick down your throat to give him that extra, good love), as a holiday gift. Valentine’s day is coming up too, so there’s another gifting opportunity for you to seize. Put your pride aside. Give her what she needs. Accommodate her.

Just don’t look in the mirror while you’re wearing it. You’ll look stupid.

Check the tech specs. From Amazon

  • Latex
  • 5.5?x 1.5?/14 cm x 4 cm
  • Weight: 3.2 ounces
  • Comes in black or beige.

Happy stroking!

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Wet Fantasy Fulfilled: “James and Ellen, Together at Last” (A Review)

Sometimes, you just want to get away, to escape your life and get caught up in a world where the only things that matter are the good feelings of the heart, body, and sex organ. Sometimes, you just want to read about something different and special. Something that will make you say “if only it was me” while you are reading it.

“James and Ellen, Together at Last” , by Stephen Olander  is one of those reads.Cover for 'James & Ellen: Together at Last'

Blurb-James and Ellen had been waiting for a year until her divorce was final. Now they can be together and discover more about each other besides their love. (M/F, M/M/F) 

Most people would consider James and Ellen as wild. Ellen is a woman in control, completely certain about what she wants in the bedroom, finding her perfect match in James. Their intimacy is intense, unbridled. They aren’t afraid to go there at all!

Let me tell you, the things found in this book would make the average freak blush, yet they’d secretly tell you that they would do just about anything to get a chance to play either James or Ellen for a day.  When I say these two “take it there”, I mean it! Everything that you could imagine a lover succumbing to on a mission to please their lover, and themselves, is contained within this book. 

Open it up for back-to-back sessions of raging sex that only a wickedly, erotic mind could come up with.

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“James, Ellen & David”

The heat continues to rise when Ellen goes where she, nor James, has ever gone before, and they both end up loving it in book 2.Cover for 'James, Ellen & David'

Blurb-A special rendezvous between James, Ellen and David (M/M/F) 

This series makes for perfect reading if you want to get hot right now. It is written in a way that the reader never feels bogged down with complicated questions and scenarios. Stephen Olander gives you two quick and stimulating reads, when all you really want to do is get to the orgasm.

Find both books only on Smashwords.