I Lick My Own Pussy, Baby!

If only dreams could come true, so easily. I have been floating on a cloud in my sleep about this very thing, auto-cunnilingus, since I was a wee teen.  Upon waking from a self-pussy licking dream, I always have an intense throbbing in my clit that just gnaws at my soul. In my dreams, I can bend forward perfectly and lick me. The shit is impossible when I’m awake. Big tits are in the way, and my stomach is no washboard.  But I am a woman that believes if I dream it enough times, it’s meant for me to do it. I WILL lick my own pussy. Someday I will.  How? Come with me. I will share.

I won’t be getting a rib removed, and I won’t be shifting my internal organs by way of corset waist training as this was how it was likely made possible over a hundred years ago.

Is it shopped? Let’s say no so my hope can live.

Stretching the neck, back, and hamstrings are safer methods to getting your body to become more flexible for the forward bend C. Spending regular time dropping the neck forward and gently pulling it down to your chest with your hands laced behind it, and bending the torso down so that the face is between the legs will lengthen and loosen the muscles in the back and hamstrings. Exercising the hip flexors wouldn’t hurt either. Historically mine has been tight. Stretching and loosening my hip flexors has also improved my posture.

How long before I can lick my twat? 2 years? 3? Is my attention span that long? Maybe I should put up a photo in my bathroom behind the towel rack, to hide it from the minors, as an inspirational shot. When I’m brushing my teeth I will pull back the cloth, admire, then bend.


When my dreams are realized and I can finally touch the tip of my tongue to my clit, will I be gay? Bi golly, no.


Will tasting my own pussy from the fountain directly instead of on my fingertips make me the shit? Obviously!

Will Mr. Drama be threatened by my self-eating abilities? He said he will let me have at it for awhile. His tongue can rest some months. I said no it won’t. I’m greedy. We can both do me at the same time. He said our heads will collide. I said we can maneuver, stop being logical. I’m still dreaming here.

Autocunnilingus, like autofellatio, is the ultimate in self-pleasuring. It couldn’t be a sign of something wrong, deviant, or disturbing. I don’t think the act goes against one’s sexuality. It’s just good, clean, own junk slurping, tasting, and drinking fun.

It’s all the rage! Let’s lick!

Will you?





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