Reader Email: Fucking On The Curb

The Eroticist’s Advice 

Hi Ms. Eroticist. I have a question.

Is it normal for public displays of affection to lead to public sex?

–Sex in public places


Dear “Sex in Public Places”,

Hmmm. This is kind of a tough one for me. As wide open as I am here, I’m very private otherwise. I tell and show what I please at my own comfort level, yet I do understand that others are much more open than me with their sex lives.

Is it normal for a peck on the cheek, or a swat on the ass in public to turn into full on banging? Not in my life, but there is indeed a distinction I must make between sex in public and sex in front of the public.

Sex in public could happen behind a quiet corner of a department store next to the men’s pants, or fingering her under the table at an outdoor restaurant. In both scenes, the two have must use discretion in their play, and this is not the same as pulling out your junk in the line at the movie box office and shoving it in. A little sneaking and freaking in the parking lot in the car during lunch hour at a bustling, fast food joint can be a rush, but so is definitely not on the level with riding it out in PlayLand. The latter will get you banned and arrested I’m sure.


In “Sex in Public Place’s” question, there were no clues as to what they meant exactly, but if they did mean sex in front of the public as I’ve defined it, they must consider themselves an exhibitionist. To exhibit sex or simulate it in public is normal at varying degrees. Children do it all the time, small babes. Wouldn’t a girl who wears shorts up in her ass fall into the category of exhibiting her sexuality? I do think so.

Again I‘d like to point out, this week we have another reader who writes in with a question that seems to seek approval of their sexual activities. I am not one to tell you you are wrong.  What I will do is make suggestions.


Advice Breakdown 

Assess your lovemaking sessions. If sex in the public, or in front of people outside of your private spaces has already been problematic for you, address the amount of time you are putting into sex. Are you being fulfilled having enough time when you have sex? Is it rushed? Are you getting enough attention orally? Is the lovemaking not as fierce as you want it to be?

As I’ve talked to people over the years, one thing I notice is that many people believe that a vibrant sex life is one where the partners have multiple acts of sex in a matter of hours, but the acts themselves are only short bursts. If this is true for you “Sex in Public Places”,  spend more time finessing the atmosphere to bring about more closeness when you are grinding down for the most dripping wet, puddling sex possible with you.

Take it to the glass, and make it last. Mmmm


“Uh-uh-uh. Ohhhhhh pound it! Give. To. Me. Ohhh. Ah-aaaaahhhhhhh.”

Mmmm… That’s the stuff. From sheets to the streets, all I ask you freaks to do is make it naaaasty.  Just don’t catch any charges and expect me to help you out or anything. No my brotha, you’re on your own!

–Meet me back here next week when we answer one reader’s question on oral and the age old question of how long to wait.

Keep the questions coming! If you have a question for The Eroticist to answer, write to TheEroticistsAdvice at g mail dot com (make it look like a real email address before sending), and your question will be answered on this blog the following Tuesday. 

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